MAKE SPACE TO THRIVE

Stela Nicol
May 13
4 min read

Updated: Sep 7

"You can do anything, but not everything," David Allen

I wish this one hit home automatically every time.

When I started something new like diving into strength training, adding a morning lymphatic massage, jumping into a face yoga class, getting excited about Everglow Vitality, or (yet again) committing to another creative project, it didn’t always come naturally to remind myself:

Something's gotta give.

Because time isn’t magic. It doesn’t expand just because I'm inspired.

If I want to train consistently …

If I want to actually follow through …

If I want this new thing to stick …

I can’t just ask, "When and where will I squeeze it in?"

I have to ask:

What will I do less of?

What can I pause, put down, or say no to for now, so this new thing has room to breathe?

Because squeezing it all in doesn’t work forever. It leads to burnout. Or broken promises to yourself.

When You Try to Do It All

Be honest: How often have you found yourself overcommitted, excited, and full of ambition, only to crash weeks later under the weight of too many goals?

Maybe it started like this:

You overhaul your diet, start a new workout routine, download a new wellness app, promise to meditate, journal, get 8 hours of sleep, drink 3 liters of water, and somehow still keep your life running.

Why? Because you’re superwoman. Or at least … you’ve tried to be.

I’ve been there too! Spinning ten plates, answering emails with one hand, eating lunch standing up, and believing that doing more meant being better.

And then there’s that moment (usually with a glass of wine in hand or after a night out with your girls) where you think:

"That's it. New routine. New me. Tomorrow, I'm doing it all."

Our brains love a dramatic fix. We crave transformation.

But change doesn’t stick just because we want it to.

It sticks when we make space for it.

Why Do We Do It All?

We live in a world that praises hustle and hyper-productivity.

Women, especially, are celebrated for multitasking, managing careers, families, relationships, and somehow still aiming to be the healthiest, most polished versions of themselves.

So what happens?

We try to reinvent our entire lives at once:

New diet. New fitness program. Early mornings. Clean skincare. Cold plunges. Journaling before dawn.

Until we’re exhausted and wondering why we “can’t stay consistent.”

You might have heard this before: It’s not a willpower problem. It’s a system problem.

If you're standing at the edge of change, feeling overwhelmed by all your exciting new plans, pause and ask yourself:

What am I subtracting to make space for it?

In wellness, more isn’t always better. Real momentum comes when you clear the clutter, not pile more on.

Want to train consistently?

Start a creative project?

Reset your nutrition?

You must clear space: physically, mentally, and emotionally.

That might look like:

Letting go of evening scroll time to go to bed earlier
Skipping a mid-week social outing to meal prep
Saying no to that extra project at work

Not forever. Just for now, so your new habit has room to grow.

Because once you’ve created that space, that’s when progress becomes possible.

Try This: The Subtraction Strategy

Here’s a simple but powerful framework I use with clients who are ready and willing to change:

Audit your week: Where’s your energy going? What’s nourishing you? And what’s quietly draining you?
Pick one thing to add: Not five. Not three. Just one new habit or intention.
Something small, meaningful, and doable. Something you feel excited to explore.
Pick one thing to pause: This is the part we often skip!!!
What will you remove or pause, even just for now, so the new habit has room to breathe?
Maybe it's a weekly obligation, late-night screen time, or even just your expectation to "do it all".
Reassess in two weeks: Don’t just “stick to it.” Check in.
Ask yourself: How does this feel? What’s shifted in your energy, your mindset, your mood?

It’s not flashy.

It’s not a 30-day sprint.

It’s a sustainable rhythm.

It’s also about alignment.

When your habits align with your life, your real schedule, real capacity, and real desires, they stick. That’s when wellness becomes not just another task on your to-do list, but a lifestyle that sustains you.

When you add something new,

try habit stacking: attach the new action to an existing habit. E.g.

Do your lymphatic massage after brushing your teeth.

Meditate right after making your bed.

Small steps. Repeated often. These become your anchors.

And always check in with your nervous system.

If the change feels like punishment, your body will resist it.

This is about support, not pressure.

Redefining Success

Every habit you commit to is a vote for the kind of woman you’re becoming.

So don’t just ask:

“What should I do?”

Ask:

“Who am I becoming through this?”

Maybe you’re becoming the woman who protects her rest.

Who nourishes her body.

Who lifts heavy.

Who says no, without guilt.

Who takes up space and guards it fiercely.

This post was inspired by Coco Chanel’s famous rule: "Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and take one thing off." Shared recently by Kate Solovieva, Director of Community Engagement, and it hit me in the best way.

We don’t need more noise. We need more clarity.

We don’t need to do more. We need to make space.

So: What will you take off your plate to make space for the life you want?

Wellness "Wisdom", Continued ...

If one day you feel like you need support or want to explore building a healthier relationship with food, let’s have a chat and work through it together!

The information provided in this post is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as medical advice or a substitute for professional consultation. Please consult a healthcare provider before making any significant changes to your diet, exercise, or wellness routine to ensure they align with your individual needs and circumstances.